i can feel the static

Summer holidays are here properly now. I'm quite hyped up for them. I hope this doesn't result in false promise. Alf is home Saturday night so I can't really see anything being bad for a while. It's going to be brilliant to have him back. It's really weird thinking about how long its been since I saw him. We're going to have a poker night soon and that'll be brilliant, because well, its poker night isn't it?

I am really feeling good about my love life, or currently luck there of. Thats fine. I need to learn to be ok alone and I think I have done that. I've also learnt the skill of playing it cool, which before this month I think would have been an impossibility. Yet I have not spoken to Clara while projecting the image that I am much happier without her (only half true), I have text Holly in an understated way and gained a reply that I did not turn into a proper conversation and I have met a girl who I like (and who i am 99% likes me equally) with whom I have not yet made a prat of myself. Its all winner winner chicken dinner.

I would like to fall in love again and go through all the magic bits at the start of a relationship. The main problem is that I am in love with Los Campesinos! and nothing else will ever compare.

isn't it? isn't it?

TV shows will come and go but there will never be a quiz quite like University Challenge. Everything about it is just so on the money. Paxman, the voice guy, when the hot girls come on from Newnham College, when the weird girls come on from Newnham College. Its just amazing. I mean they just had a picture round on Chess champions. one of them was Deep Blue. Amazing. (Incidentally Mark told me that his Dad was nicknamed something like Light Blue in chess circles when he was young. Thats fucking gold.)

This weekend was pretty lifeless but sandwiched between some pretty exciting events. College on Friday was pretty dull but afterwards there was a BBQ on Jesus Green and it was just a perfect afternoon. I smoked a cigar. That was cool. I met Laura's friend Bea. That was cooler. (That sounds like a Hold Steady lyric. FUCK YEAH) I had a great sandwich again that night. Sandwiches are great.

Saturday was dull. Work dull. Evening dull. I did rewatch most of Spaced though. Awesome.

Sunday I decided to restart my Facebook which I had shut down the week before. This was a great decision. I feel like i'm really making friends. Too bad it took like the whole year, eh?

Monday was quite staid in the day but the evening brought to me my glorious quiz. I love monday nights. Good friends and good times. Delicioso.

a day makes it better

Today was a great day. I spent time driving to school in a van with my dad, I had two interesting and informative lessons, I had a nice chat with Gina, I wandered around London for hours with Mark and then saw the most amazing gig. I fucking love Los Campesinos!. I live and breathe for them. I wish Ellen would look at me, or at least respond to my twitterings at her.

this has been a great day. I even just had an amazing sandwich. wow.

it'll all get better in time

Every day I wake up and its a better day. I miss Clara painfully and every day for at least a second I pine out loud for my bear, even though she and no one can hear. The nights are the hardest. I want her beside me. But if I have to not, then i'll probably be able to not die.

But I need someone. Anyone. It's getting awfully lonely this life