i've a very shrewd way with words

weird weekend. was going out with collegio's for Gemma's birthday but ended up with Stacey in my bed. not ideal but duck broken. let's move on.

REMINDERS

1. never ever, ever go out on a Saturday

2. never ever, ever go to Ballare

3. never forget where you're coming from.

the great frontier

The overwhelming feeling that I have in life is one of missing out. Not one of particular envy or jealousy, just that there are so many brilliant things in the world to do and experience and I've scarcely done any. I'll get on this. I have to be more assertive. I have an idea, left to me in a dream. The most perfect idea I've ever had. I can still taste those few seconds of dream on the tip of my tongue. I'm going to do it. I hope it works. Wish me luck.

haunted

It's 2011 now. I thought things would change, and maybe for a day or two they did, but things always stay the same. Last night I dreamt about Clara. I often dream of Clara. I haven't spoken to or heard from her for 6 months but still, she's there. It's like a much less exciting version of Inception. The her in my brain becoming less and less like the girl I knew. Can I do anything before she leaves my brain? Or do I have to move on before the spectre will leave?

A large part of the problem lies within my not moving on is to do with my not feeling attractive. I was once, I am sure of it. Girls wanted me. Was it because I was in a relationship at that time? Did I become more attractive by my being in a relationship or did the confidence and happiness that I had by being in a relationship make me a more attractive person? I'm hoping the latter.

This all said, I have some things for the future that are looking exciting. I hope there are more parties. I can do parties.

2011 YEAH??